{"id":179,"date":"2006-10-05T14:04:08","date_gmt":"2006-10-05T14:04:08","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.akumaprime.com\/?p=179"},"modified":"2014-10-01T16:02:16","modified_gmt":"2014-10-01T16:02:16","slug":"my-three-churches","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/akumaprime.com\/?p=179","title":{"rendered":"My Three Churches"},"content":{"rendered":"

<\/a><\/p>\n

One of the Worst product names I’ve seen<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

Originally uploaded by AkumAPRIME<\/a>.<\/p>\n


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It might surprise Many of you that I am a member of Three Churches: The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster<\/a>, the Church of Bob<\/a> and most recently, the Church of Google<\/a>.<\/p>\n

I post about this now for two reasons. A) Three is a magic number. B) the Church of Google is special. Most modern religion, or at least the dominant ones, worship intangible, esoteric deities. Older religions worshipped more accessable things such as the Sun or earth or sea. So the Church of Google is different in that it deifies something that we can all perceive. The effects of Google are indisputable. You ask Google a question, and Yay I say unto thee, it doth Answer. Unlike prayers to abstract gods, the benefits of worshipping real things are far more obvious and definite. Google is even a kind enough God to allow you to search for other Gods through it… Truly, a beneficent Lord.<\/p>\n

So if anyone wants to join my Churches, please just follow the links above. Ah, I must note: Whenever these Churches are referred to as “parody” religions, please understand that these are words of ignorance. Truly these Religions are the True Religions, and their members are devout.<\/p>\n

May his Noodly Appendage bless thee, We are All BOB, Google<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

One of the Worst product names I’ve seen Originally uploaded by AkumAPRIME. It might surprise Many of you that I am a member of Three Churches: The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, the Church of Bob and most recently, the Church of Google. I post about this now for two reasons. A) Three is […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2,4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-179","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-life-is-like","category-philosophy"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/akumaprime.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/179"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/akumaprime.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/akumaprime.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/akumaprime.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/akumaprime.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=179"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/akumaprime.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/179\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/akumaprime.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=179"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/akumaprime.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=179"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/akumaprime.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=179"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}